We are being desecrated, our creativity pillaged by the Indian sitcom and movies. Media plays such an important role in moulding a society that it could procreate a Yudhisthir out of every Duryodhana; instead we have a media that is hell bent on creating millions of Romeo and Juliette….pardon me Raj and Simran! We claim to have the biggest movie industry in the world in terms of churning out movies. 99% of those are crappy love stories. Every time the boom is thrust onto a newbie’s face; you can hear them mumbling the same script “mera character zara different hain…yeh story zara hatke hain.” You watch the movie and it’s the same old single layered monotonous, moth eaten tale of a youngster who falls in love with a dewy eyed, dove like ‘dumbo’ who can give away her ‘jaan’ for him. Usually this ‘dumbo’ is the daughter of a Dad who can put Lakshmi Mittal to shame as far as pampering his kiddo is concerned. Generally the girl’s pa hams all the way. Usually what follow are a dozen songs and our protagonist slogs and hams his way into Pa’s ‘dil’ and steals away the ‘dulhaniya’. Pa finally gives into peer and ‘puthri’ pressure and also claims that – tera pa bhi tere liye aisa ladka nahi dhoondh sakta! Oh MY God!! I just disclosed so many Bollywood stories here. But mind you, there can be variations too; you would generally miss those if you are not an avid Indian movie fan. Seriously, Indian film industry should be ashamed of blaming the entire society but it for this debacle. Good movies are seldom produced. No new creativity is ever encouraged. If we don’t experiment how are we going to learn? While Hollywood movies are also about space exploration and terrorism (in the most realistic way); we are still reeling behind dealing with matters pertaining to heart and worse we still don’t mention family planning or safe sex. 50 years of movies and we still allude to matters where eroticism erupts; we also refrain from swearing onscreen.

As if this wasn’t enough, we have a linguistic partisanship in the film industry. Bollywood produces only Hindi movies, yep originally ‘trite’. Hindi is the national language, yep. But why is there always a ‘Punjab’ifying of movies and ‘Gujarati’fying of TV serials?!! We loved Punjab in DDLJ and in movies before it but I find this ‘aping’ by the creative lot increasingly idiotic and unbearably unpleasant. We are tired of our belle’s dash through the grange signifying vivacity and ‘idiosyncrasy’(yeah!). I am sure even girls in Punjab find that dash idiotic. My point is that there are 28 states in India. We claim Bollywood is Indian movies. Why is there only Punjab in Indian movies? Thank you Priyadarshan Sir, for all your efforts in bringing forth the Maharashtrian spirit through movies such as Hera Pheri and Virasat. We have a start there,hurrah!!!

We are a country with 28 states and the number of languages and dialects..... only God knows how many! A layman in Delhi still doesn’t know the difference between a Tamilian and a Keralite. Likewise, a layman in Mumbai doesn’t know the difference between a Haryanvi and a UP guy. For him everyone is a BHAIYAA! Who is to blame for this?? Of course BOLLYWOOD!! If they represent people appropriately, confusions won’t erupt and India would be closer than ever. It is impossible to create a movie with only ‘Indian’ness in it because each of us has a ‘MAA ki tongue’. We are subconsciously closer to that than our national language e.g Yash Chopra infusing Punjabi into everything; all characters are essentially Punjabis as if people from other states never fall in love; Raj Thackerey locking horns for the Marathi Manoos, Amitabh Bacchan contesting elections from Allahabad.

Lets pour some Orissa, some Nagaland, some Mizoram, some Assam, some Haryana, some Jammu &Kashmir…..we have loads of them, right?!! Let’s narrate these stories in Hindi! Wouldn’t that be true merging using language? We need to have movies which are creative in thought, which have some substance …some element of mystery thrown in, atleast a pinch of true science, a spoonful of social message strewn over a stew of emotion and action. You don’t require a mindful of thought, just a handful of proactivity would be enough to start with. We don’t expect a Titanic or Star Trek from you; we would be content with an original idea. There are so many good authors (read book writers) in India. Why can’t we simply adapt a good book into movie?! Yaah yaah I know about Chetan Bhagat’s books being adapted into movies. I sincerely hope that the trend flourishes and is followed religiously.

Love-ology!

Love …what is love? Is it the most amazing experience ever? In Devil's Advocate, devil compares love to eating thousands of chocolate at once.Why? Do people really sacrifice or stalk when under the 'influence' of love? It seems like just another emotion yet has been projected as ‘so powerful’! The word 'Love' has its origins in Germanic forms of Sanskrit term ‘lubh’ which means desire. Philosophy describes as love as ‘ejection of emotions’. Biology describes it as a state where there is an increased secretion of dopamine by hypothalamus. It says that the secretion is higher than in case of lust. It is said that you can simply switch off the sexual urge but never a romantic surge. Now….now…if a biologist-playwright was to describe Heer’s ‘love for Ranjha; he would put it something like – there she (Heer) saw him (Ranjha), the gait so graceful that her dopamine secretion increased and went into overdrive.

If you ask someone who had just had an increased dopamine secretion (I mean… fell in love) about his/her sweetheart, their eyes would glow up like thousand lamps just lit up even the most masculine men would blush like a princess and softer genders blush like…hmmm…hmm…I don’t know. If granted a wish, they would wish for….no not world peace…they just always wish to be by their darling, their inamorata, their beau…..they would also add that …they would just want to sit beside their loved one and peek into their eyes and that they could just fritter away their entire life lauding their ‘beloveds’ beauty and poetizing it.

But I am sure something happens after that because lust does ensue love (def. not talking about parental affection). Lust is due to sex hormones which are triggered by dopamine. Love also leads to increased oxytocin which leads to cuddling and which generally culminates in sex.

I have a friend who falls in love every other month and gets laid too (he is not Indian); I am sure this guy has a serotonin transporter gene. People with such a gene often mistake the initial thrills and anxiety for love and go for it. So what happens to his previous love(s) and associated hormones?? I don’t know about the ‘girls’ but his 'love' hormones are replaced by endorphins. As far as I am concerned, I am sure I am completely devoid of this gene. Even if I ever happen to fall in love I would skillfully parry those feelings regarding them as anxiety and thrills.

Ever heard of the phrase PYAAR TO ANDHAA HOTA HAIN RE! Love is blind…..RE!! People actually fail reality test. It has been seen that people notice only good things about their partners in the first 2 to 4 years of relationship; that is because of the enzyme Phenyethylamine. After four years the levels of this enzyme come down. That is why Americans live with their partner for at least five years before they get married to them. Now don’t ask me about the high divorce rates in USA. I don’t know:). It is very true that you have to live with a person to know him/her.There is nothing such as love at first sight but there, sure, is lust at first sight.Some goody two shoes argue that only men know of such a thing.Others wont argue because they know the truth.

It is natural that lust must ensue love but in some civilization like ‘ours’..love ensues lust. ..yaah pehle suhaag raat phir pyaar ;) . A civilization where girls set high standards for the groom and finally settle for the one that their parents point out to.Yaah yaah even the goody two shoes!!I would really like to study that phenomenon but I am short of candidates and devoid of an experimental model.